This just in... LAN POWERS PASSED HIS BLACK BELT EXAM !!

..... FLASH.... .....FLASH....

.............URGENT BULLETIN................

Dateline: June 6, 2005
Midland, Texas

Regional Rapscallion Reaps Rewards In Martial Arts Exam!

While partaking in a martial arts seminar in Houston, Texas, local businessman and entrepreneur, LAN POWERS, under went testing for the rank of Shodan (1st degree black belt). Multiple sources have confirmed this story, and now your faithful reporter has exclusive statements from Mr. Powers "brothers-in-arms."

"I see what it is." says Sensei John Couch. "Lan's been sandbaggin'! We all knew he was 'okay,' but he's been holding back and wanting to show off in front of his buddy Robert down there in Houston! See, now the pressure is on Robert to kick it into gear and get promoted." John Couch, Shodan Midland, TX

"Sure he passed his test, but can he park backward?" asks Sensei Michael Cervantes. "See, if he can do that AND listen to Carlos Santana without rockin' out and wrecking his truck... then we'll really know he's black belt material" Michael says with a wink and a grin.

"You have to look at testing with a Zen attitude" says Lan's instructor, Sensei John H. Riggs III, Esquire, Yondan, D.C., D.A.B.D.A. "One is either ready for a test or one is not ready for a test. In this case, it was a simple matter of catching Lan before he had a chance to run out the door, toss him into oyowaza highfall and pin him to the mat by extending my Ki... until Kato Shihan was ready to call him up to take the test. Piece of cake really... throwing Lan around, that is. Lan? Oh... he was a nervous wreak!"

Friends back in Midland cheered at the news of Mr. Powers announcement of passing the test. Said one fellow," yeah ." And there was much rejoicing.

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